LA Moms Blog

My Baby Daddy is a Number

Cross posted from our sister site, Silicon Valley Moms Blog.

Some people make love to make a baby, I made an Internet purchase.

I must have been 10 or so when I knew what I wanted to do with my life: I wanted to be a mother. It was all I've ever really wanted to be. There was no career, life experience or world travel that could compare to the need. Motherhood was always my destiny. And as life would have it, I was faced with making my own destiny happen.

I decided in my mid-twenties, that by the time  I turned 30, I'd be a parent. I figured if I wasn't married, I'd hook up with a hot guy in a bar and wham-bam-thank-you-ma'm, imakeababy. Not so easy. Somewhere along the way a  friend of mine offered his "goods" and I told him I'd let him know if I'd ever need them. When I turned 31, a year past my goal date, I asked him to donate sperm. He broke my heart when he told me no, since he had been diagnosed HIV Positive. After a soul-searching trip to Mexico, I came back with a new plan: I would find a sperm donor. I would be inseminated. I would have a child. And that is exactly what I did.

Continue reading this post here.

The birth and death of an Angel

My best friend in the entire world died a year ago on Sept 5^th, 2008 of Liver cancer.

Doesn’t make any sense to me that someone so pure of heart and strong in spirit could ever perish at all.  I still hear his laugh, see his piercing eyes while he holds my head in his hands and says, “you are loved!”  But he is gone…and yet I celebrate his birth on the day of his death because it reminds me that if not for the fact that he was here on this earth, I would never have known a greater human being.

 My friend was so magnificent.  He sort of made you feel reborn every time he connected with you.  He had a power in his presence.  A magic, childlike twinkle in his eye.One that I wish I possessed and have practiced in certain moments, but never perfected.Probably because his greatness and unique way of connecting with people can only be defined as Divine. 

I miss my sweet friend.  Yet, he is always with me in my memories.  I even have an old message machine tape of his voice.  And do you know what he’s saying on this tape??  He said, “I’m here for you Suzie.  Anything you need, you just ask my love”.  Isn’t that incredible?  That a random message on an archaic tape recording from about 17 years ago would be my best friend speaking the most eloquent and calming words one could ever hear repeated?!

The Silicon Valley Moms Group Healthcare Town Hall Recap

These days, the topic on everyone's mind is healthcare.  You can't turn on the television, listen to the radio or pick up the newspaper without hearing of the latest "town hall" meeting or a new debate about healthcare reform in Washington, DC. Quite frankly, it is EXHAUSTING and CONFUSING!  On August 18-19, 2009, Silicon Valley Moms Group contributors added their voices to the fray.  Through written and video blogging, we shared our stories and opinions on this important topic. 

Here are the links to all the posts, and the wide variety of viewpoints they represented:

Silicon Valley Moms:

• Linda: Healthcare for a Dream Life
• Tina: The Questions of Healthcare
• Robyn: One Working Moms Take on the new Healthcare bill 
• Darryle: Two Hearts
• Nicole Peltin: Healthcare - the Dreaded Pre-Existing Conditions
• Erica Cosgrove: a Professor Mom Speaks Out
• Rox: the Business of America May Be Autos and Banks, but it Shouldn't Be Healthcare
• Sidney: Something Needs to Change
• Myrna: My Experience with the French Healthcare System
• Jill: The Stress of Being the Sandwich Generation
• Karianna: Autism is a Dirty Word in Healthcare
• David: Best Healthcare Plan: Diet, Exercise, and Cocktails
• Anna: Socialized Healthcare: What's in a Name

Chicago Moms

• Kim: Healthcare Reform Needed - Different Year, Same Story
• Jeanie: Food for Thought
• Melanie Myatt: Our Healthcare System is Broken
• Miss Lori Asks for Help - Healthcare Evolution
• Shannon Capanna: On July 27, 2009, We Became Part of the Problem
• Angela Allyn: My Healthcare Debate
• Susan: Healthcare is Bleeding Families and Small Businesses Dry

DC Metro Moms

• Sandie: My Mother's Story
• Sue: Healthcare Reform and Children with Chronic Conditions
• Jessica C. :Let Patients Get the Full Picture
• Jill Berry: My Healthcare Experience as a Foreign Student
• Amy Adams: Healthcare Reform is NOT a Race
• Michelle: What About the Children?
• De: We're Lucky We're Insured, But...
• Linda Kerr: Agree on All Points, Unsure of Direction
• Aimee Olivo: I Believe We Need Healthcare Reform Now
• KC: A Doctor in Support of Healthcare Reform
• Andrea Meyers: How Free Healthcare in Australia Saved Me
• Jim: Thoughts on Healthcare from a Federal Employee

New York City Moms

• Carol Cain: Calling Us Lucky, for Now
• Deborah Quinn: Define "Good Insurance"
• Helen P.: Healthcare Debate, An Overlooked Factor, I Think
• KarenTV: The Ultimate in FUD Manipulation
• Jennifer Perrillo: The Healthcare Missing Link: Relief for the Middle Class
• Jessica C: My Dirty Little Secret

New Jersey Moms

• c2mom: Want the Truth on Healthcare Reform? So Do I
• Lori Landau: Kids and Healthcare: Calculating the Costs
• Mary Kate: Does this Position Include Health Benefits?
• Vanessa Druckman: Growing Up Under the Blanket of Socialized Healthcare
• MT: The Cost of Autism and Healthcare in New Jersey
• Amber Watson-Tardiff: Healthcare and Homelessness: Stories from the Frontline

50-Something Moms

• Myrna: My Experience with the French Healthcare System
• Donna: What's So Scary About Socialized Medicine?
• Annie: Lying About Healthcare Reform

Deep South Moms

• Amy: We're Already Paying Too High a Price for Healthcare
• Marty: Broken

Los Angeles Moms

• Elizabeth Peterson:I Say No to Socialized Healthcare
• Florinda Pendley-Vasquez: Healthcare: Other People's Decisions
• Donna: What's So Scary about Socialized Medicine?
• April McCaffery: There is No There There
• Sarah Auerswald: Remote Area Medical: Los Angeles Heroes!

Canada Moms Blog

• Mary G.: Community Health Centres: A Good Health Care Answer
• Crunchy Carpets: Healthcare from a Socialist's Perspective
• Samantha: I'll Keep my Dilapitated aging "Nazi Socialist*" Healthcare System Over Yours Any Day
• Karen: Navigating Stormy Waters - My Thoughts on the US Healthcare System
• Jessica: An American Girl in Canada

Philadelphia Moms

• Cecily: Healthcare Reform, My Experience, Why We Need It
• Sarah: Healthcare Bill Needs Discussed, Debated, Deliberated

Rocky Mountain Moms

• Aviva: Not Political, Personal

3rd Annual SVmoms Summer Party

Cross posted from our sister blog, Chicago Moms Blog.

In coordination with Chicagonista, the SV Moms Group celebrated its 3rd Annual Summer Party in Chicago for the 2nd time around! There was so much laughter and fun shared with our missed bloggy friends and we could not thank our sponsors enough for making this happen.

Chris Campbell of Lakeshore Branding is our extraordinaire party planner and sponsor. Not only did he provide the beautiful party space at NV Penthouse Lounge, but the wonderful SVtinis and Chicagotinis were all provided by him. Lakeshore Branding also happens to be a “digital marketing agency that makes snazzy web sites and happens to be pretty darn good at Internet Marketing”. So if any of you are in need of some web help, he’s the man to call.

That’s Caring along with Tasty Catering provided the delicious food. That’s Caring also provided a couple of their eco- friendly gift baskets as drawing prizes.

Ring Central provided the trolley that chauffeured our bloggers back and forth to the Sheraton Hotel to the NV Penthouse Lounge and back.

Yahoo provided the Tarot Card Readings that was a big hit! Whether it made some laugh, cry, or worry, I’m sure they were all some great materials to blog about.

Smarty Card sponsored the much needed free massages. Imagine a mom without her kid/s. Partying with her girlfriends in a beautiful lounge. With martinis! And now massage?! Yes, it did happen.

Photobooth Express sponsored the most fun party within the photobooth party! They were the silliest, cutest, and funniest photobooth pictures of moms gone partying.  I've personally used this company in a lot of my events and I can't imagine not having them around to help me entertain my guests. And really, how can anyone go wrong with having one of these booths in any of your parties? An instant hit to all your party guests.

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MJ Tam is the Editor of Chicagonista.com - "movers, shakers, & baby makers" and Creator of City Connect Media, Inc. that runs and operates Chicagonista and other upcoming city sites. MJ also has a personal blog called SugarMyBowl.com

Do you Twitter? Follow mjtam here.

Moms, Celebrities and Twitter: the Video

Who's Following You on Twitter? @ Yahoo! Video

Cross posted from our sister blog, Silicon Valley Moms Blog.

It seems more then ever moms are using Twitter to share what they are doing and see what their friends are up to. Twitter is a service that allows people to share "what they are doing" in 140 characters, which keeps people brief. And if that is not enough, moms are sharing their pictures on Twitter using Twitpic and their stories on Whrrl.  Twitter adds to the list of the online social networking and blogging activities moms are doing during the short amount of time they have to themselves. But a guilty pleasure has also developed among many moms who follow Twitter: following celebrities. Following celebrities on Twitter and Twitpic gives me a chance to catch a glimpse of what they are up to on a daily basis. For example, I can view a picture of Demi Moore shoe shopping or see a glamorous dress she is wearing while I (unglamorously) fold laundry. I can also get a good laugh reading Twitter jokes by Heather McDonald, Chelsea Lately show and Jimmy Fallon. I can even follow a verified Twitter account for Barack Obama.

Jane Maynard from This Week for Dinner was a late-comer to Twitter and is still building up her celebrity list of followers (current tally is somewhere around zero). She shared this Twitter story with me:

"The highlight of my Twitter career thus far was when Hugh Grant started following me. Yes, THAT Hugh Grant...Actor/Writer/Producer/baked bean thrower. Okay, so maybe it wasn't really Hugh (who has since disappeared from Tweetland), but if Santa Claus is a follower, why can't Hugh Grant be one to? And, in case you're wondering, I did NOT follow Mr. Grant back."

I was thrilled to learn two of my favorite celebrities Jane Fonda and Katie Couric are not only blogging, but are on Twitter. After I followed Jane Fonda and Katie Couric I received a big surprise when they followed me back. It is this type of interaction that makes Twitter so addicting. Jane Maynard and I also share a fascination with looking at pictures posted on Twitter.

The Pitfalls of Parenting Kids in the Age of Smart Technology

Cross Posted from our sister blog, Silicon Valley Moms Blog.

Children and Pitfalls of technology @ Yahoo! Video

I have teenagers and when they were kids, Facebook didn't exist.  In fact, cell phones weren't cheap enough for kids to own until my kids were in Middle School.   I'm definitely learning on the job when it comes to technology use and parenting.  When the kids were in elementary school, there was no discussion or mention of technology in all the parenting books I read.   Oh sure, we had a computer but not all families did. It was more of a resource for the entire family. 

My concerns at that age almost completely dealt with inappropriate content exposure.  That was so much easier to control than what I have to deal with now.  Why?  Because it's out of MY hands and into THEIR hands. 

Read the rest of this post at Silicon Valley Moms Blog.

Palo Alto: The Home of Stanford, Facebook and Cyber-bullies

.... cross posted from our sister site, Silicon Valley Moms Blog.

Did you know that 42% of kids have been bullied while online?  Did you know that 35% of kids have been threatened online?  Did you know that Palo Alto is home to the most popular Social Networking site in the world, Facebook?  Did you know that the Palo Alto School District DOES NOT have a cyber-bullying policy?  Surprised?  Me too. 

How do I know about this?  Because, this week, one of our own was bullied.  Online.  Viciously.  Cruelly.  I say one of "our" children because the Silicon Valley Moms blog is a group of mothers and this is one of our children. I felt sickened when I heard that a group of local high school students made a Facebook page for the exclusive purpose of humiliating and degrading a much younger student.  That's right.  The big kids picking on the little kid in cyberspace.  Can you imagine the humiliation?

Evidently, a small group of bored Gunn High School boys and girls got together one Friday evening and "just for fun" started a group on Facebook called, "I Hate...".  As the week-end wore on, more and more students joined the group, the comments becoming more vile and disgusting - each one feeding off the other in a "feeding frenzy".  By Monday morning, over 100 high school students, equally represented between Palo Alto High School and Gunn (2 nationally recognized schools) had joined this "I Hate" group.  As far as I know, none of the bullies personally know the targeted child.   They just thought it would be "fun" to laugh at and demean this kid online.  The comments ranged from insulting, rude comments to actual threats of violence.

Definition:  "Bully"...a person who uses strength or power to harm or intimidate those who are weaker.

CLICK HERE to continue reading on Silicon Valley Moms Blog........

CA First Lady Maria Shriver - Redefining Good Girlfriend Moves

Balancing it all @ Yahoo! Video

Representing Silicon Valley Moms Blog, I recently had the honor of chatting one-on-one with California First Lady Maria Shriver about the CA Legacy Trail.  We talked about motherhood and balancing our hectic lives.  Having watched her on television for years and having been privy to an intimate gathering of SVMB bloggers, I felt like she was a girlfriend I saw once a year.  I knew she was smart, approachable and an interview pro, so I was able to do the interview without throwing up from nerves. (Besides, I was dazzled by her shiny white teeth.) If you have read any of Maria's books, you know that she is the real deal.  The kind of woman who tells you like it is and won't sugar coat it.   The kind that is determined, has fought for her accomplishments and is not hesitant to put the spotlight on issues for which she cares deeply.   

It is not surprising that she has partnered with the California Museum to launch the CA Legacy Trail project.  Even if you are not from California, you MUST check out this new website.  Basically, through video and text you can hear stories of CA's amazing women - from  acclaimed novelist Amy Tan to civil rights activist Dolores Huerta.  These women have or are currently breaking barriers and making a difference in California and throughout the world.  Wanting to tear the walls down of a traditional museum, the project highlights "Only in California" experiences.    As a blogger and a mama, I am also excited to see that there is feature that allows you to upload our own stories, which will be part of this repository.   The museum invites us all to redefine CA history by putting a face on our stories - by telling the stories of mothers, sisters, artists, scientists, technology giants and activists.   My 4th grader is learning CA history - this site does a fantastic job of telling the story of our history beyond missions and the Gold Rush - all in way that dwarfs any text book.  It is well worth the visit.

CLICK HERE to continue reading on Silicon Valley Moms Blog.....

Hey Facebook, nursing is not obscene!

...cross posted from our sister site, Silicon Valley Moms Blog.

Today, a number of women and men are participating in a protest against Facebook’s decision to remove photos of women breastfeeding their infants, labeling the content as “obscene.”  A huge fan of the Facebook social network, I am among those greatly disappointed in what I perceive to be an anti-woman policy.  Granted, Facebook’s CEO is a very young man whose business card happens to read “I’m CEO… bitch” – something that also doesn’t inspire confidence in the organizations femme-sensitivity.  So, turn
and turn about, I intend for this post to be a kick in the balls of whichever man made this decision gentle suggestion that Facebook pay homage to progressive Silicon Valley and reconsider its policy… or that CEO Zuckerberg call his doctor parents and get the low-down on the importance of breastfeeding, as I bet he benefited from that “obscene” act himself.

CLICK HERE to read the rest of this post at the Silicon Valley Moms Blog.

excerpt from the NYC Moms Blog Post: Facebook Nurse In

I love Facebook.  It helps me stay in touch with friends and find people I haven't spoken to in years.  It gives me a platform to promote my book and share my thoughts.  And most importantly, it provides an unrivaled distraction and procrastination technique when I'm working.

CLICK HERE to read the rest of this post at the New York City Moms Blog

 

The Art and Memory of Gifts

....cross posted from our sister site, Silicon Valley Moms Blog.

As I am going through closets to find stashed Christmas presents (and I can't for the life of me remember where I put a couple of them), I wonder why I hoard gifts like a squirrel does nuts for the winter.

Growing up, I did not get much under the tree. We did not have a lot of money and, sorry Christmas, my parents were just not that into you. In the fourth grade, my large gift was a six-pack of plastic hangers. But one year my mother got me exactly what I wanted, the My Friend Mandy doll and several of her outfits, wrapped in pink foil paper with gold ribbon bows. Seeing these gifts, the pile of sparkliness when I came downstairs, was just as magical as opening and playing with them. Possibility flows through a childs mind like adrenaline on Christmas morning: What is in the box? Did my wishes come true? If I trust the universe will good things will come to me? And from these experiences protective memories can form in the golden glow of Christmas morning; the kinds of memories that sustain you later through dark Decembers of the soul.  Holiday gifts that make the receiver feel loved do not need to be expensive, but thoughtfully chosen, well wrapped and separated into as many small packages as possible.

CLICK HERE to continue reading on Silicon Valley Moms Blog.....